Hannibal Lecter cannot write the next "1000 Baby Names"

There is a terrible baby name generator. His name is Hannibal.

"If-we-have-a-child," said Hannibal just now, "Can we call it Bertha-Loomely? Or, if it's a boy, can we please call it Stanislas?"

I said patiently, "We already have a child."

And then Hannibal said, "WTFTHATTHINGISNOTMYCHILD."

And then Michael said, from upstairs, "If you value your life, I seriously hope you're talking about the wok!"

I just thought I'd mention that, because now Jason Vrees - oops, excuse me, Voorhees - is knocking madly on the door going, "HELP ME HELP ME HELP MEEEEEEE!". I shit you not. I really must go open the door to the poor child now.